Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Of Humor

releasing a billowy fart in the aisle of a supermarket
cheeseburgers and wine
waking up in the bed of an actual UFC fighter
with a psalm tattooed on his right bicep
and posters on his wall
of other UFC fighters

kissing girls with a 1996 haircuts
slut-dancing to stupid music
without caring that she's not an English major
or an Artsy-type or very friendly at all

advising your ex ex girlfriend's ex boyfriend
as he weeps in a darkened stairwell
as an act of altruism
as a war-buddy

meeting the person
your friend met over the internet
and flew into Milwaukee
from the Peanut and Peach State

stealing sodas 
from Taco Bell
for a week

participating in a talent show at an art school
MC'd by a fat hipster
who told jokes about his dick 
and the holocaust 

losing at a talent show at an art school
to a fake drag-queen
who sexually assaulted four audience members
and smelled funny

consuming alcoholic beverages containing actual gold
on Tuesdays
doing actual cartwheels over actual Buicks
in the actual dead of winter
dreaming weirdly about Menorahs
while seeing her daily
in different locations
and circumstances 
as if were all made up 
by someone with a sixth sense
of humor